Tag: self-confidence

Living In The Danger Zone

“I feel the need…the need for speed!”

We all know and love the infamous movie. Whether back when the original came out in 1986 or the sequel in 2022, no one can doubt that the movie is iconic. I mean, who doesn’t love sexy navy pilots?

Just like everyone else this summer, I couldn’t get “Danger Zone” out of my head. The feeling of pure joy, listening to the “Top Gun Anthem” while watching flight crews ready the planes for take-off is absolute bliss. I wanted more. In fact, I can vividly remember leaving the movie theater, queuing up Kenny Loggins, and driving my car like I was the one flying those F-14 Tomcats. I was entranced with not only the movie, but the characters, music, and the infamous storyline. Now, I can spend the next couple of paragraphs going on and on about how amazing Top Gun truly is. Yet, it is the message behind the films that have captured my true attention – although I can’t deny I did really enjoy the beach scene…both of them. 

As summer shifted into fall, I couldn’t get the movie out of my head. I found myself constantly wondering what it would be like to live amongst Rooster, Hangman, Phoenix, Bob, and the others. Instead of fighting it, I decided to embrace it. Using one of my favorite movies, I was able to increase my productivity and accomplish my goals more quickly. So, without further ado, here’s what I like to call the “The Top Gun Mindset.”

1. There needs to be discipline in your life. While it doesn’t have to be as extreme as a naval officer like in the movie, it is necessary to properly be in the “Top Gun Mindset.” Self-discipline is the most important part of this mindset because it is what you need to stick to the mindset. Set a routine. It can fluctuate based on the day, but consistency is key. When you hold yourself responsible for the little things in life, such as making your bed, keeping your bathroom counter clean, or responding to text messages right away, it makes the larger things seem much more doable. Personally, this was the hardest part of the mindset for me because there were times when I really wanted to stray from my routine. Yet, I stuck it out. While it wasn’t fun at the moment, it was worth it by the end of the day. I felt more accomplished and productive with the time I was given during the day.

2. Do everything to the best of your ability. Iceman didn’t graduate at number one because he just showed up to training. No, he was #1 because he gave everything he had to whatever he was doing. When you put your mind to something, you need to give it your all every single time. While doing this, you also need to remember that there isn’t just one definition of success within life. What looks like someone else’s best may not necessarily be your best. Just look at Iceman and Maverick! Both are highly decorated pilots and arguably the best within their field, yet both live very different lives. In the second movie, Ice is an Admiral and Maverick is a Captain. Both men consider themselves extremely successful, yet are sitting at different positions based upon the calling which they felt as they grew older.

3. While it’s ok to want to be successful and push yourself, you need to remember to live YOUR life. From the beginning of the movie, watching Maverick and Goose sing their rendition of “You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling,” we’re reminded that all aspects in life are worth living and sometimes you need someone to remind you of it. It’s easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, especially as a college student. Slow down and have a little fun every once in a while. Look at Goose Bradshaw (my favorite character of all time)! He found the time to balance the areas of life that he thought were important: being a loving father and husband, a reliable RIO, and a class act piano player. Goose knew that a little humor every once in a while might be exactly what you need, especially in a life full of stress and responsibilities. My advice? Screaming “Great Balls of Fire” at the top of your lungs is a great way to have a quick dose of fun, especially the version sung by Miles Teller (those Bradshaw men knew what they were doing with their song choice).

4. You have to believe in yourself. There’s a fine line between acting like you’re confident and actually having confidence. Within both Top Gun movies, despite putting up a cocky exterior, Maverick is constantly doubting himself. He wasn’t necessarily selected for Top Gun and with the loss of Goose later on in the movie, we see his attitude constantly getting in the way of his capabilities. As an extremely talented pilot, Maverick wasn’t able to truly rise to his skill set due to his failure to believe in himself. It might take some time to get there, but that’s ok. In fact, take the sequel for example! Top Gun: Maverick originally started in 2010, yet wasn’t published until 2022. Just remember that Rome wasn’t built in a day.

5. WWMD? What would Maverick do? Although the hot head pilot is a bit chaotic, I can’t help but admire his ambition. While I don’t recommend a fly by when the tower specifically told you the pattern was full, embrace your life with that mindset. Don’t let anyone tell you what you can and cannot do. If there’s a specific thing you want within life, get it. Now, if you’re too much of a Maverick you’ll come off as difficult and stand-offish. Yet, once you find that fine-line between being a trailblazer and respecting others, there’s no limit to what you can achieve.

In conclusion, now you have a perfectly good reason to go re-watch Top Gun and Top Gun: Maverick. As such a fun, inspiring series, there’s so much more that you can learn besides what I’ve listed above. While not a navy pilot (although I do imagine what it would be like to fly alongside Maverick ), these lessons have truly transformed my life, making me more productive with not only the things that I need to do, but the things I want to accomplish. Now, I hope you join me in putting on some aviators, cranking up some Kenny Loggins, and ride right into the “Danger Zone.”

Romans 8:18

Relationships have always been fascinating to me. There are so many ways to form connections between two people: friendships, siblings, parents, co-workers, exes, teachers, and family. Each connection is special in its own way; no connection is the same. A bond, unique to two people, a special secret, unable to be recreated no matter the effort.

When broken down ever further, you’re able to find specks of each individual within the relationship. The most vulnerable, deepest parts hidden in the beauty of forming a connection with another human being. Relationships are craved, wished for, and desired. From the beginning of time, God emphasized the importance of having relationships when he created Eve for Adam – or even when he instructed Noah to put two of each species on the Arc. It is human nature to seek a connection in someone else, no matter what connection is formed.

With this being said, relationships hold many opportunities for lessons to arise, which usually begin with questions: How do I express myself in this relationship? What can I do to deepen this connection with said person? Is there a specific way in which I show love? This list could go on and on. While I’ve experienced different types of relationships and connections within my life, there’s one major lesson that has struck me the deepest – and was the hardest to learn. 

I know that I’ve mentioned in some of my previous writings a high-school relationship that wasn’t the greatest; and now, instead of looking back on it negatively, I find it humorously positive. To give y’all a little background knowledge concerning this boy, let’s just say that my time spent with him was not the healthiest. At the moment, the relationship seemed like a completely normal high-school relationship, yet once we had broken up, I realized what it truly was: toxic.

We had started dating in the spring of 8th grade and I had no idea what a relationship was supposed to look like. Sure, I had ideas due to my obsession with Romance movies and books, yet I knew that a middle-school boy was far from capable of Matthew McConaughey in How to Lose A Guy In 10 Days. Our relationship started out pretty normal, in typical middle-school fashion. Yet, it was when high-school started when things began to go downhill. 

Freshman year is hard enough as it is. Lots of adjusting socially, academically, and for me, athletically. I was really looking forward to the beginning of high-school as it was full of plenty of new opportunities. There were new classes to be taken, new freedoms and responsibilities to take on, new coaches to play for, and new clubs and councils to help run. I was over the moon, yet as the year went on I found myself growing more and more insecure. Now, I know it’s normal for a teenage girl to be insecure but this was a newfound level of insecurity that I was experiencing. I had no idea of how to fix it or what was causing it, but as I looked towards sophomore year, I figured I would have it all solved by the time school started again in August. With a summer of camp and time to grow ahead of me, it would all work itself out.

Boy was I wrong. Sophomore year progressed and it only got worse. It was so bad, that I had friends constantly asking me if I was ok…multiple times throughout the day. I had no sense of identity. Eventually, I figured out it was due to this boy. He was constantly saying and doing things to make me feel like I wasn’t important or good enough, yet would say things emphasizing how much his mental health and well-being relied on me. I let him dictate pretty much everything, letting him wrap me up in all of his own issues and insecurities. By being swept up in such a toxic environment, I had lost a sense of identity, especially within my own relationship. 

Trying to prove myself to him, but most importantly myself, I was overworking myself, my mind constantly full of doubts: in the classroom, on the athletic field, and even in my own bedroom, a space where I should have found solace. When COVID lockdown hit I was able to take a break from everything and self-isolate. I’m so thankful for the fact that I was able to quarantine with my family on our ranch in Carrizo Springs, TX, where I spent a majority of my childhood. Being back down in the south, among the dirt, wild flowers, and family, I was reminded of who I was and where I came from. 

I went through that summer slowly gaining a sense of identity back. Having spent my final year as a camper at Camp Longhorn, I headed into August really looking forward to my junior year – I was finally taking my favorite class at Saint Mary’s Hall (AP English Language), getting back to full strength on the soccer field, and was in the works of launching the blog. Yet that all came to a screeching halt the day before class officially started. He broke up with me and offered no real explanation as to why. How did I take it? Amazing. Truth be told, I had wanted to break up with him throughout the summer, yet was terrified due to the fact that his mental health relied so heavily on our relationship. I had no idea what he was going to do to himself if I had broken up with him. After he had left my house, I spent exactly 15 minutes crying over him, then went back to watching my episode of Criminal Minds that he had interrupted when he knocked on my door (the men of the BAU are far more superior). 

I spent a lot of time healing following the break-up. My junior and senior year was spent finding my voice, and most importantly, figuring out my identity that I had lost in him (I’ll save this story for another post since it’s kind of long). I ended up doing a complete 180 when it came to my college application process, but I chalk that up to growth (another story for another post). As my senior year progressed, so did my confidence. I was able to find my personal style and an edge to help get me through the more difficult battles of life. My love of writing was reignited, so much so that I published one of my pieces in my school’s literary magazine. I had a new breath of life and was ready to take on college life. 

Now, why did I spend the past 7 paragraphs rambling about a toxic, high-school relationship? Because it made me realize the importance of maintaining prioritizing your sense of identity in a relationship. You should never lose sight of who you are in-order to impress anybody, especially if it’s to save a relationship from ending. God puts people in our lives for specific reasons, and you will find people who you shouldn’t have to compromise yourself for. Be confident in who you are and what you stand for; and don’t let anyone else dictate the rules of your own life. 

For all those reading who are younger or feel like they’re going through a similar situation, I’d like to end this post off with a letter I wish I could send to my 9th grade self:

“The pain you have been feeling cannot compare to the joy that is coming.”

Romans 8:18

My 5 Lessons of High-School

I still have not wrapped my mind around graduation. There is no possible way that my high-school years are complete! Looking back, I don’t regret a single action, decision, or memory. Looking forward, I cannot wait to see what God has in store for me in this next chapter. Now, while I do look back fondly on my time at Saint Mary’s Hall, there were many lessons learned. No, I don’t just mean school work. Some hold more importance than others, but all shaped me into who I am today.

First of all, I learned that good friends are really hard to find. My best friend and I, while we did meet in 8th grade, didn’t become close until my junior year. I had no idea that the girl who I color coded notes with in Physics freshmen year would be my partner in crime. While it was hard to imagine myself with such a good friend at the beginning of high-school, I can’t imagine myself without her now. She’s seen me through thick and thin and vice versa. We may be separated next year, but miles can’t destroy friendship. It only makes the memories even better and the future even more exciting.

Secondly, I learned to never lose sight of who you are and what you love. For the better part of high-school, I hid parts of me that were different from others. I wanted to fit in, so that was the best option: becoming a copy of others. I had no passion, following the crowd in the hallways like a lost sheep. When COVID hit the second half of my sophomore year, I was in a bit of a dark place. I had no idea what I wanted to do in my free time. Now, I’m grateful for that realization because it led to me finding new life, new passions. Thus, Peach and Grace was born! My old passions were reignited and I felt like myself again.

Third, I lost and found my self-confidence. I was a very confident child, knowing what I wanted and who I was. When I entered high-school, that all changed. Now, a majority of that is due to the fact that I let a boy dictate my life, but that’s a story for another post (coming soon!). When that relationship finally ended, and with the help of my favorite teacher of all time, I was able to find my voice. Before finding it, I wanted to blend in, the comfort of a small community. Now, I’m ready to speak out into the world; and believe me, I have plenty to say. I’ve experienced what it’s like to be silenced and I don’t want to go back. Once you’ve found your voice, hold onto it. Be proud to use it!

Fourth, surround yourself with like minded people. My freshmen year, I really didn’t join any clubs. I ran for sports council and that was it. My Sports Council career has been one of my proudest accomplishments in high-school, but that wasn’t satisfying my hunger for involvement. My junior year I branched out, joining the Young Conservative and Independent Voices club. My senior year I branched out even more, joining Creative Writing, Philosophy, Student Investment Group, participating in a city wide finance competition (we won btw), and even playing lacrosse! It was my last year it high-school and I wanted to make it count by filling it with memories that will last forever. By surrounding myself with new things and like minded people, I always had something to look forward to, never dreading another day at school.

Finally, and this one may seem a little nerdy, but I learned the value of a good planner. The one thing that keeps me sane in my busy world is my little gold binder. It has everything going on in my life, even what blog posts I’m going to publish next! Every little idea that pops into my mind gets scribbled in that binder. I’d like to confidently say that I’ve mastered the art of planning, but I feel I’m always learned new tips and tricks, especially from Tik Tok. Whether you like planners or not, I highly recommend finding a way tot keep yourself organized. It definitely makes life easier.

Now, this isn’t everything that I’ve learned in my high-school career, but I would say these are the top 5 most important lessons. Some were learned the hard way and some the easy way, but each holds the same amount of importance in my eyes. I definitely plan to use these as guidance throughout my next 4 years of college (I’m already organizing my schedule in my planner as we speak). Whether you’ve yet to enter high-school, are currently enrolled, or have graduated like myself, I hope these help you however you chose to implement them.

What? Like It’s Hard?

Everybody knows the iconic story of Elle Woods. From a young age I was enamored by her and her hard work ethic, strong will, and refusal to give into the stereotypes of others. She has always been an icon for me, especially her style. Those outfits am I right?!

I’ve always wanted to be her, and recently I realized we’re pretty similar…minus the getting dumped and following a man to Harvard Law part.

My freshmen and sophomore year of high-school I had no confidence. I let someone else define who I was, pushing me down to better themselves. It wasn’t pretty. Instead of enjoying the few years I had in high-school I spent my time alone, keeping my head down as I went through life. I felt as if I couldn’t do what I wanted, instead having to sacrifice my desires for this other person.

The tides turned my junior year. I had finally separated myself from this person, yet I was probably just as lost as I was when I still associated myself with them. Having no clue who I was, I spent time reflecting, trying to decipher some sort key to life. It was hard, but manageable. I slowly started to build self-confidence, finding my voice through the one thing that I’ve always loved: writing.

Now, during the final stretch of my senior year, I could never imagine living my life how I did my freshmen year. I have complete faith in who I am and what I stand for. In fact, this person has tried to come back into my life, but I refuse to let them belittle me like they did a few years ago. Sure, it would be nice to put them in their place, but I think living my life how I want tastes a little sweeter.

Ok back to Elle Woods. Similarly, once she found out who she was, she didn’t let Warner bring her down whenever her success was greater than his. She stood firm, continuing to do the things she loved.

In-order to live life to the fullest, you need to have faith in yourself. Things could change overnight, but the only constant will be yourself. Know who you are and flaunt it. It’s not like it’s hard!